Another Dating First: Running into a past date

Hello all! I know my posts have been rare lately, but I promise things will pick up a bit more. Not because I’m expecting a lot of action or anything, because things with Olive are going very well. I’ll just be updating you on all sorts of things going on with me, Olive and everything else. But on with the show …

Saturday night, Olive and I were out on one of our rare “adult-only” dates. Her son was spending the night at a friend’s house and mine was out of town visiting his mother. We went to a Japanese steakhouse we’ve been wanting to go to for a while. We sat down around the hibachi with the other people waiting for the “dinner show” to start. While waiting, Olive noticed that directly on the other side of the table from us was someone she went to high school with. This is a lot more common than you’d think. She runs into people she knows all over the place. The guy was with his wife and kids and they never actually said anything to each other.

After our drinks arrived (sake and beers) and they took our order, Olive departed to the restroom. As I watched her walk away, I noticed someone I thought looked very familiar sitting at the table. After I did a double-take, I notice it was Constance and her kids sitting right next me. Actually, her daughter was sitting right next to me and Constance was next to her.

I don’t know if she recognized me, but neither one of us said anything to the other. It was just odd, because it has been like a year since I dated her and this is the first time I have run into any of the other girls I have dated here.

As you have probably noticed, I just posted the update of when Constance and I first dated. That’s because I’ve had it written and sitting in the draft folder for a while and since I wanted to share this story, I figured I’d better post it to give you all a little background on her.

I hope you’re all staying warm (preferably with someone special).

Come back again, and see me sometime.

Constance: Started so well, then POOF it was over (Rewind)

This Rewind post will be more of a relationship synopsis instead of just a date review.

Constance, as the C name would suggest, is the third attempt at dating this year as I start this single-dad dating thing.

Clearly, since we went out, things on Match worked out well enough for us to see each other in person. So we set up a date a local Mongolian barbecue place that I love. When she showed up, she looked pretty much as advertised in her profile pictures, except she was wearing glasses, but that was nothing to dwell on. She was real tall for girls that I date, she was 5’10” without shoes, so with shoes she was really close to my height (6’2″). But she was dressed very very casual, wearing jeans, tennis shoes and the female equivalent of a t-shirt. It wasn’t as bad as Hermione, but still, I was dressed well for the occasion.

The date went really well, conversation was good, we shared some good stories and then went to a bar for some drinks after dinner. She told me about the time she went on a date with a guy from Match who looked nothing like his profile picture, and when she asked him about it he said “you wouldn’t have gone out with me if you knew what I really looked like.” Duh, but falsifying yourself is so much better, right? After that date he went in for the kiss and she dodged the bullet, but then he asked for a ride home because someone dropped him off for the date. She said no and went to her car. Waiting to see what the guy did before she tried to leave, she noticed him cross the parking lot and get into a car and drive off. Creepy!!

Anyways .. moving on. Things went really well and we saw each other a few more times. There really seemed to be a strong connection developing.

Then it all fell apart in (literally) an instant.

I was hanging out at her house after she made me dinner and we were sitting around the kitchen table drinking beers and chatting. That’s when I mentioned – in passing as part of the conversation – that early on after my divorce when I wasn’t seeing anyone I would let me ex-wife stay at the house when she was in town visiting our son. She slept in his room every time and nothing ever happened between us. I was, and still am, NOT attracted to her anymore. She is such an ugly person inside that it doesn’t matter to me what she looks like, I’ll never be able to sleep with her again. Too much baggage and drama with her.

That’s when Constance flipped. She literally snapped. She got all upset and went on about if that was her ex, she wouldn’t be able to resist sleeping with him and that it wasn’t ok for her to be staying there. Keep in mind this all happened long before I met Constance, and there was no chance she would be staying at my house anytime soon. I kept trying to assure her that if she didn’t like it, it wouldn’t happen if we were still dating the next time my ex-wife came into town. That didn’t matter.

The “argument” spilled over into the next day over text messages. I repeatedly tried to make her see that it happened long before her and I knew each other and wouldn’t happen if we were still together the next time she was in town. She kept on going on about how I was obviously choosing my ex-wife over her. What?? How is that? How is something I did months previous, and NOT actively doing, translated into me choosing my ex over her? I said I would totally understand, that if my ex came into town and I let her stay at my house while Constance and I were still dating, her getting all mad at me for that . That would be understandable.

I kept trying to make her realize that she was making a big deal about something that wasn’t real, something that hasn’t actually happened, hoping she would see she was overreacting and let it go. But after about 20 minutes of texting all of this back and forth, she finally said “Don’t ever text me again!”

OK. Done. And I haven’t heard from since.

Things started off so well and then, BAM, she flipped and it was over. It was the strangest “relationship” I’ve had in a long while.

Sorry this update isn’t as detailed as the others. But it has been so long since this all took place, I didn’t want to bog down the story. If I wanted to grade the first date, like I’ve been doing, I would’ve given it an A-/B+, but after things ended it would totally skew my opinion of the whole thing.

Back to your regular programming, citizens.

Olive Update: So much for being on a break

So much for being on a break, huh?

I can’t believe it has been more than a month since my last post on Christmas Eve. I apologize for that, but things have been 50 shades of busy and crazy. The Spring semester of college has started (only one more semester left after this), I’ve started looking for a job to get me through the Summer, my son and I are getting ready for baseball season, and things with Olive have been going very well.

I guess that’s what I should probably update you all on, since that’s pretty much the only reason you read this.

This update won’t be as much of a date night play-by-play as the others, but more of a encapsulated overview. And I’ll try to make it short and sweet since a lot has happened since my last post.

Olive and I met literally on New Year’s Day, after more than a month of emailing and talking. The Holidays really got in the way of us finding time to meet. My Match subscription ended at the end of December, and as I stated previously, I was done dating for a while and was going to take a break.

Maybe I should have quit and given up sooner, because once I did, Olive entered the picture and totally blew me away. She had to in order for me to forego my Holiday Hiatus.

She’s a sweet, blonde, country girl with a rock-hard body because she is crazy into fitness and works out every day. She may look small but she’s all muscle which makes her surprisingly heavier than you’d expect. She has a son about the same age as my little guy, and they get along famously. Yes, at this point, we’ve met each others’ kids and they’ve met each other.

Things started off real slow and easy, due in part to scheduling issues, but once we started seeing each other, it became more and more regular and with greater frequency. At this point, she’s over every Wednesday when her son is spending time with his father, and pretty much all weekend whether she has her son or not.

Things were going so well with her, I was more cautious trying not to mess things up. It took several visits together before we actually kissed and then much longer before we actually slept together. Then again, my schedule with my son probably played a big part in that because I don’t have a lot of free nights with him around and we’re not having “adult sleepovers” with him in the house.

For the first time since starting this dating journey, I’m actually willing to call someone my girlfriend and start to make plans for things more than just a week or two out. Like my son is very excited to go to her parent’s farm where all of her horses are, which we are putting on hold until the weather gets better. Freezing temps and snow don’t make horseback riding very enjoyable. We’ve also signed up for some running road races together. So, that’s a good sign she’s willing to do that and I’m not freaking out about it.

And yes, we have plans for next weekend, but NOT on Valentine’s Day – per se. We might be together, but not making any plans or going out. Go figure, the one holiday I was most trying to avoid with a new girlfriend, and here I am, caught in the trap.

This weekend I’ll post the update about the conversation with my ex-wife when I told her about Olive. Just reinforces why I’m glad I’m not with her anymore.

I hope you’re all staying warm and not buried in too much snow.

Til later!