Staci Update: Second date success but something’s jamming my radar

I wasn’t really sure I was going to have the opportunity to post a second-date follow-up on Staci. I was really hoping to, but things weren’t moving as I had hoped they would, so I wasn’t sure.

One thing’s for sure, this one is perplexing me. I’m normally very good at reading signals, following cues, and figuring out people (especially sooner than they are ready for me to), but this time is different. This time I’m seemingly getting crossed up, apparently missing signals, reading things wrong, and can’t figure her out. It’s like something is jamming my radar. But it makes for a very interesting challenge.

As I mentioned in the previous post, she was going out of town for the weekend with her friends. Even though I hadn’t heard from her in a few days, I texted her saying I hope she has a good time over the weekend. She responded and we had a small back-and-forth. I closed it by saying she needed to hit me up after she got back so we could set up another time to get together. I didn’t ask, I just said this is what needs to happen. She said ‘OK’. Again, about a week passed and didn’t hear anything from her. Nothing about the weekend, nothing about being back, nothing about following up on another date.

So I gave it one last try. I convinced myself this was the last time I tried with her, if I didn’t hear anything back or even if she brushed me off with quick, meaningless answers. Thursday, I asked her how her weekend trip went. She jumped right back into things like they were normal. We caught up pretty quickly that day and continued talking into Friday.

My read on the situation – again, unclear – but seems to be leaning that she IS interested but wants me to initiate all of the contact (at least for right now). I could totally be wrong, and she could be a serial dater looking to go out with anyone who will pay for it, but isn’t into any sort of relationship.

So Friday, I got the news that my son was going to be spending the night at a friend’s house on Saturday. I know had an open window to see if she wanted to do something. I asked her if she wanted to do something, she said she had a pool party with some friends during the day but wanted to do something that night.

I’ll be completely honest, I was about 50% certain she was going to cancel because she had been out late at a concert the night before and then at the pool all day Saturday. Gladly, that thought was wrong.

We went out for a late dinner and drinks. She looked amazing … again. We had a great time and great conversation over dinner. When the restaurant closed, we want to go somewhere for drinks. We ended up driving to bar about 20 minutes away because there were no bars near the restaurant. We took my car, leaving hers at the restaurant.

We went to a nice bar with a rooftop lounge and found a cozy padded bench in the corner. We watched the baseball highlights that we on the tv and talked baseball and sports. We also talked about 101 other things, sharing lots of things and there was also lots of laughing. An excellent sign.

From the time we left the restaurant, we were holding hands; walking to the car, in the car, sitting at the bar, etc. She would caress my hand or forearm, or even grasp my bicep occasionally. Another excellent sign. It was about 2 a.m. and the bar was about to close, so we headed back to the car.

Back at the restaurant, I parked near her car and escorted to her it. There we lingered and had an excellent goodnight kiss. It seemed to last an hour, and this time it was exponentially more intimate than the first time. It was great! At one point, she told me “you aren’t making this (leaving) easy for me.” I answered; “I’m not trying to make it easy for you.” And the “goodnight kiss” continued.

But there was one signal I couldn’t exactly figure out was; she’d occasional grab my hands and interlock our fingers and put her hands behind her back (with mine still interlocked with hers). For being so early on in the dating process, I tried not to read too much into it. But it seemed very submissive, like she was wanting to be dominated a bit. Like she wanted me to hold her hands behind her back, similarly to pinning a girl’s arms down on the bed during sex or making out.

Finally we parted ways. i was already intending to text her once I got home -thanking her for a great night and letting her know I wanted to see her again, but she beat me to it. She actually texted first – another very good sign. So I texted as soon as I got home, and again early in the afternoon the next day.

And we’ve been talking regularly ever since – even more frequently than we were before.

So now the challenge is finding the next time to be with her. My son leaves to spend the next 6 weeks with his mother this coming weekend, and then 4th of July weekend and my oldest son’s birthday the weekend after that. So finding time might be tricky. So goes the life of dating Mr. Mom.

I’ll be sure to keep you updated, and as always, thanks for reading.

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