Hey-oo!! Bet that grabbed your attention, didn’t it?? You’ll see where I’m going with that in a bit, but trust me, that has NOTHING to do with me!
First, an update. I had “The Talk” with Krystal about what she was expecting from me in this swinging relationship of hers. After all of the comments and hints of jealousy, I expected a lot more drama. But basically, she saw things my way. She agreed she would have no reason to get upset with me for seeing other women, especially given her situation.
She did ask that if I was going to get into a serious/sexual relationship with a girl, that I let her know and we part ways at that point. That’s totally fair. I mean, if I was going to have a sexual relationship with a legitimate girlfriend prospect, I would definitely end things with Krystal first.
There is no way I would start a potential serious relationship having a side piece in my pocket just for sex. I mean, if that’s all she (Krystal) is there for, and I can get sex from my new girlfriend, then what’s the point of keeping her (Krystal) around? There isn’t any.
And she respected the fact that I brought it up before I did something “wrong” and upset her.
Deep down, I know she doesn’t like the idea of me seeing another girl, but she knows she has no room to say anything about it. Even though this has been interesting and kind of fun, I am really (honestly) on the lookout for a serious girlfriend candidate.
The good news is, I have a date with a new candidate Friday night with Lola – the tall hairdresser. Stay tuned!
Now for the good stuff.
I have a friend that used to be a co-worker with me back in days in the Washington DC area. She still lives there, and we keep in touch every now and then. We are very similar yet total opposites. She writes a dating blog as well and we share stories, swap advice, and all the fun stuff like that. Recently, we had been talking about her wanting to have “The Talk” with this muscle-head teacher guy she was dating. They went out for a few weeks and she was ready to get exclusive with him, and they finally had sex.
And that’s when things went sour. He kind of dropped off the radar (I’m over simplifying this) and then eventually stopped returning messages all together. When this situation of him not responding to her first started, we discussed her needing to have “The Talk” with him. So she set a time to have “The Talk” with him the next time she saw him, which was on their regular Thursday date (last week). The date never happened because he never responded to her.
A few days passed, and finally enough was enough. She could not let this disrespectful behavior go unnoticed and unpunished.
Before I get to the juice, know that the worst thing you can do – especially after having sex – is end any sort of relationship by just “ignoring it away.” Have the guts to at least say something as to why you’re done with the relationship. It’s the respectful thing to do. Sure, we’ve all had first dates where you never talk to the person again (I’ve done it and it’s happened to me), but I’m talking about relationships where you’ve started to invest yourselves in each other. Even though it will hurt, it’s the right thing to do. I do it because I would like the same courtesy.
OK, now on with the show.
She told me she’d had enough with this dude and wrote him a serious nastygram. I am sharing this letter with you, in its entirety because I loved it SO much, I asked her if I could please share it with you. She agreed, mainly because she wasn’t sure about posting it on her blog. So for your reading enjoyment, her it is.
“You’re a coward. I was gonna stop by Rhino and ask you what made you pull back so fast. But I didn’t want to scare you. It’s just really inconsiderate to totally stop communication the way you did. It’s immature. Even if you thought my feelings would be hurt, you should have shared your thoughts.You complain all the time about lack of respect and common courtesy from people, yet you can’t even give it. Maybe that’s why you don’t receive it.I think I was more than kind to you. I took into consideration that you fight depression and I tried to give you compliments and make you feel good. I didn’t even tell you that I didn’t have an orgasm not even one time. I didn’t want to hurt your feelings. And I thought that in time I would teach you how to bring me to that point.Maybe the interracial thing was too much for you, or maybe you met someone else. I even thought you felt I was getting too close to you. Whatever the issue, you really should have told me. I think we built enough rapport for that expectation.I guess i just wanted some sense if closure. I had been dating others while we dated, and I continue to date, but I was hoping to get closer to you. But I remember when I met you, you told me you’re always a woman’s second or third choice. At the time I thought you meant it as if you didn’t prefer to be in second place. But I understand now that you don’t want to be the first one.All that is cool. Thanks for a fun summer. I just wish my last memory of you didn’t include you prematurely ejaculating, and farting all night.Take care,And I wish you success in life.”